To be honest ….

I really dislike the words “to be honest”. I avoid using this phrase and also don’t like reading it. Not because I dislike honesty. I try to be as honest and open with my thoughts as possible. I tend to keep things to myself, but not because I’d mind saying the truth. In fact what I dislike about “to be honest” is that it implies that I’m not always honest. Nobody would ever start every sentence with declaring his or her honesty. Does that mean he or she is usually lying? Of course not. And still when you use it, it lets everything else seem less sincere.
You want to give your words more weight? Use the power of language. It’s quite easy to express your honest meanings with the spoken language, but also not impossible with the written one. Say it in more details and your honesty won’t be doubted.
For example: “To be honest, I really like you.” doesn’t sound half as good as: “I really like you. You are so much fun to talk to. It never gets boring. And you’ve got a lovely personality.”
Of course this can vary, but your point is clearer if you not just say you’re being honest, but go into detail in your honesty.
Another reason I dislike this phrase is because it’s often followed by something negative. Used as an excuse to say something hurtful. Being honest means saying the positive and the negative. But your honesty is no excuse to be mean. Believe it or not, there are nice ways to criticize. Once again a detailed opinion is the key.
To be honest I think it’s just a phrase nowadays. To be honest I don’t think people are valuing honesty enough. To be honest I think a lot of people still lie when they start a sentence like this. To be honest I guess a lot of people prefer being lied to, because the truth can hurt. To be honest I don’t think being lied to makes anything better. To be honest I prefer the truth, cause then life can go on.
To be honest I still dislike “to be honest”.

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Posted on August 5, 2014, in Quick thoughts and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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