I’m sorry, but …

What a useless combination of words. I’m not sorry at all to say so, because it’s just the truth. I’m starting to think that people don’t know the meaning of “I’m sorry”. Cause if they knew and really felt sorry they wouldn’t go on with “but”. There are no buts about being sorry. Either way you are feeling sorry, or you are not. Simple as that.
The problem actually is that people are apologizing in advance. But why would you do that? When you already know that what you want to say will hurt the other you should think about not saying it at all. Is it necessary to hurt the other? It never is. Is it necessary to say it at all? If it bothers you, go ahead. Is there maybe a nicer way to say what you want to say? Most possibly yes!
I’m not saying that there’s always the purpose to hurt the other. I guess people are just so used to say they’re sorry that they forget that saying you’re sorry doesn’t make up what you said. They are just words. If those words have no meaning you can’t expect the other to forgive you.
The more often you are saying it the likelier it becomes that you won’t be excused. Sooner or later nobody will believe you.
I think it’s a matter of apologizing for being honest. To fill the gap between “Always be honest!” and “If you have nothing nice to say, don’t say anything at all!” people apologize for their not so nice honesty. They feel the need to be honest, but through it’s nothing nice they choose the way of apologizing in advance.
Still I think it’s a totally useless combination of words. I think we should teach our kids to always be honest. We should teach them a way to be honest without being mean. And therefore we should start learning that ourselves.

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Posted on August 11, 2014, in Quick thoughts and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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